Lessons from failure
I’ve been falling, bleeding and occasionally breaking bones for most of my life. I’m not masochistic, at least not by the traditional definition.
adjective: masochistic
1. deriving sexual gratification from one’s own pain or humiliation
1.1. (in general use) enjoying an activity that appears to be painful or tedious
– from Oxford dictionary
That second (1.1) definition makes sense. I’m a skateboarder. I started at 13 years old and it’s been part of my life for many years. Up until skateboarding, I never broke a bone and I’ve never broken bones doing anything else. I have fallen down a lot.
As a skateboarder, you find yourself face to face with the the ground often (see the chart of falls per year above). It’s part of the learning process. You have to be willing to fall, get up and try again, fall and continue to try. It’s painful, demoralizing but when everything goes right it feels really good. More often, it does not go to plan.
I started to wonder if my experience with falling down was common. I asked colleagues, friends and strangers two questions.
- When was the last time you accidentally drew blood?
- When was the last time you fell down?
The answers were all over the map and surprising.
What I expected was this.
Answer to question 1: Over a year ago, I cut myself shaving.
Answer to question 2: I fell down in the street at the end of a late night drinking with friends.
Many people gave answers like the one above. What I did not expect was quite a few people find themselves bleeding and falling all of the time. One person said simply, “I’m clumsy and I fall all the time.”
As Mr. Seinfeld observed, being a skateboarder forces you to accept constant failure. It’s part of the process and while many learning endeavors are this way, none are as immediate and physically intense as a wood and metal object spinning and flipping into your shins repeatedly – for fun. While learning to play the drums, I was never attacked by the kit. Yes, it was frustrating at times and failure was rampant. But I never felt the pain of a torn ligament, broken bone or sprained wrist while trying to perfect a piece.
This video sums it up nicely. This is one session with complete dedication and steel will to get the trick. This isn’t normal. Chris Cole is one of the best skateboarders on the planet. What I find the most interesting is that his first attempts look foolish. It’s as if he has zero chance of making it. Slowly and painfully, he dials it in and gets closer and closer to the goal. This is what skateboarding is about, what it teaches you every time you go out. Some days you reach the destination and other days you get broken off. But, through the process, you learn something new with each attempt.
That’s all I can ask for – progress.